18 September 2016
Useless AA coach, Useless AA players = Useless AA Springboks
By Mike Smith
18th of September 2016
Die Springboks het alweer verloor. Ag, maar hoe lekker kry ek nou.
40-10 or something my mate (a big Springbok fan) told me. I mean…who the fuck cares?
All relationships go through certain stages:
First you love her unconditionally…then you start seeing the flaws and want to change them. When you see that doesn’t work, you want to compromise and settle for less. Then disappointment goes over into dislike and later… blatant hatred. Eventually you leave, but still do an occasional checkup. Ultimately you reach the stage where you just don’t give a flying fuck who she is shagging at the Moment or not. Life simply moves on; you find someone else.
That is how it is with me, the Springboks and my new love; Women’s beach volleyball.
I was never good at Rugby. Played under 19E for my school. “Die Wynspan” het hulle ons genoem. But I loved the game. Back in the old days, when Uli Schmidt was the hooker, Morné du Plessis the eighth man, Tiaan Straus and Rob Louw on flank, Divan Serfontein the scrumhalf, Naas Botha the flyhalf, Danie Gerber centre and the Du Plessis brothers on the wings…Rugby was an intelligent man’s game. Just about every man in the team had a university education. Uli Schmidt and Divan Serfontein were medical doctors, Tiaan Straus a lawyer, Morné du Plessis a psychologist, etc. Back in those days we didn’t mind players of colour such as Errol Tobias and Chester Williams, because they were there on MERIT and not, because of the colour of their skin. They thoroughly deserved to be in the team.
O my…how it has all changed. A team of idiots, coached by an idiot. Bunch of palookas, man. What an embarrassment to all the great Springboks who once donned those jerseys in the past. And that idiot of a captain who looks like a gigantic baby. How can anybody take him seriously? Dok Craven en Frik du Preez draai in hulle grafte om.
And what is with this “Stampkar Rugby”? I thought the idea was to run past your opponent not into him. Maybe the idea should be to outsmart your opponents. Be so sneaky that it takes five of them to bring you down and you draw them in to create an opening for your mates in the backline.
Maybe in the old days running into and over your opponents worked for the Springboks, because the Afrikaners are genetically freaks and naturally bigger and stronger than the All Blacks, but those days are gone. Have you seen the All Blacks lately? Scientifically top fit, bigger and stronger than the Springboks. Physical domination is now on their side. Stampkar Rugby simply doesn’t work anymore. One All Black now takes down five Springboks, not the other way arround.
You can see the All Blacks know the game. They have studied it into the finest detail. They know how to operate on the edge of every rule. They know how to make the best out of every single centimeter of the field. They are masters at every aspect of the game. No wonder they make it look so easy.
Poor Springboks haven’t got a cooking clue. Running around like clowns more interested in their hairstyles than winning a game. But then who the fuck am I? I know nothing about Rugby. I played under 19E, remember?
I bet you the All Blacks are really proud of themselves. Like Mike Tyson being proud of beating up Robin Givens. Pat yourselves on the back All Blacks. Well done, mates! All those flour bombs worked. You are finally capable of beating the handicapped, dumbed down, cripple and useless Springboks. Finally they are worthy of playing the mighty All Blacks.